Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Did You Hear the One About the Iranian Used Car Dealer?

An Iranian used-car dealer in Texas has a relative in the Iranian military and they're actually super spies who tried to hire the Mexican mafia to kill the Saudi Arabian ambassador to the U.S. because, well, just because. I mean, everybody knows ALL IRANIANS ARE TERRORISTS!!!11!. And the news just happened to break the same day President Obama's jobs bill was defeated in its first test vote in Congress strangely pushing that event off the headlines. And strangely Secretary Hillary Clinton and various members of Congress are now rattling sabers against Iran again instead of commenting on the U.S.-supported Yemeni dictatorship gunning people down in the streets. And just a couple weeks ago it turned out the U.S. sold bombs to Israel that would be perfect to destroy, say, an underground nuclear facility in Iran.

Suuurrrre. I believe it's all happening just like the government says it is. Don't you?


  1. I don't know why, but my favorite is the part about the Mexican Mafia. It's as though they knew that it would sound too Hollywood if they said it was "The Russian Mob" but they knew not enough people would get the reference if they said it was the MS-13. So we get this stupid made for TV story involving La Eme.

  2. It is just so over the top. Get me Hollywood casting!

  3. Not from Sir Walter or Che, just a pearl from Waterdeep/Wicked Web:

    What a wicked web we weave

    when first we practice to deceive

    Spinnin out a house of make-believe

    We're like a serpent on the ear of Eve

    Well, brother if you mean to tell the truth

    You better improve your diction

    Cause the words that you been letting slide

    are definitely fiction

  4. you realize this means we get to claim that obama has prevented 100% of terror attacks on american soil since taking office, right? not that it's the most honest statement, but it will help us!